said a tearful Alisia. Barry McKay, Berkshire Hymie says to Ruben: "We've been friends for years. I'd do anything for you. If I had two houses I'd give you one." "That's very kind," says Ruben. "No problem," says Hymie, "if I had

of place all on one fork. Barry McKay, Berkshire Send letters to Winner's Dinners, The Sunday Times, 1 Pennington Street, London E98 1ST or email

cheaper down the road. Barry McKay, Berkshire Pray tell, in last week's photo , how much did you pay to have the ferns droop over the faces of your two younger standees while they left your overtanned puss unmasked? Ted Wynne,

was to my prolific emailer Barry McKay. He started 2009 saying I was a useless has-been who knew nothing about food, service or anything. Somehow the mood of his emails changed and we became pen pals minus a pen. I now rely on him for at least

might well improve it. Barry McKay, Berkshire At Carluccio's in St Pancras I ordered a sambuca, normally delivered with three coffee beans and a lighter. Staff denied me the lighter on the grounds of health and safety. The manager said

out", may I wish you and Barry McKay the best of luck in your new life together. He'll need it! Clive Burton, London Send letters to Winner's Dinners, The Sunday Times, 1 Pennington Street, London E98 1ST or e-mail

Fawlty look a saint. Barry McKay, Berkshire Send letters to Winner's Dinners, The Sunday Times, 1 Pennington Street, London E98 1ST or e-mail

missives You and Barry McKay should honeymoon at Sandy Lane. You can enjoy the couple's massage, dance to The Winner Takes It All and visit the Cliff in disguise to marvel at the rudeness of the waiters. Janet Bell, London I